Monday, 25 January 2010

"Hey Neytari, it's Toruk on line 1"

Just had a baby? Absolutely no idea what to name the bouncing little bicep of sheer unadulterated fun? Stop fretting over that baby name book (Attn: Chiswick - Archie is so last year) and choose something truly 'original' and brand spanking new. Like 'Neyteri' or 'Toruk'.
I know these Na'Vi names might sound a bit wacky/zany but, rest assured, you never walk alone. That's because the number of babies named after chavatars in box office behemoth "Avatar" is rising by the milli-second. In one generations time the Avataris(z)ation of the world will be 100% complete. By 2025, the president of the U.S. will no longer be black. She'll be blue, have a tail and get round on a loyal, sexy beast.
So, why's "Avatar" caught on in such a big way? Well, for starters the 14-years-in-the-making Fusion 3D (c) technology is so immersive that you can never, ever actually leave the film. Anyone who has been ensnared by the parallel universe that is Cameron's LSD-laced monster movie knows they can no longer bare to exist on Planet Earth (so last year). I, like you, spend every waking moment wishing I was bounding through the phosphorescent Graceland that is Pandora.
Some proper diehards are so blue to exit their local multiplex only to find themsleves plonked back on Planet Earth that they've set up chatroom discussions mulling "Ways to cope with the depression of the dream of Pandora being intangible." Most conclude thus ..."I even contemplated suicide, thinking that if I do it I will be rebirthed in a world similar to Pandora, and that everything will be the same as in Avatar."

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