Everyone knows hippos are the grumpiest animals on the nature block. They routinely overturn innocently bobbing boats just for the sheer hell of it. It makes them absolutely roar with deep, toothy laughter. So, why are they so goddamn mean?Well, it turns out the answer is simple: they loathe living in Africa. But they heart Europe.
This stunning news comes coutesy of Nikica, a Montenegren hippo (yeah, what's wierd about that?) who has ridden the gifthorse of a flood in the Lake Skadar region to swim over her zoo pen fence into the mouth of freedom.
And guess where she's chosen to settle down? Clue: it's not hot, sweaty, sunburny, arid Africa. Nikica has plumped for the local village of Plavnica.
"I just like the Balkans' lifestyle," revealed Nikica, "the pace of life suits me - so chilled - and I love heavy meat dishes washed down with plum brandy."
This breaking news is especially startling given hippos are traditionally veggie.
.. freedom has a mouth? With teeth and a tongue?
ReplyDelete.. who's he?
ReplyDelete